Marital problems have started contributing to stress in a very big way. Day in and day out we hear people succumbing to marital problems with the growing numbers of suicides among married people especially males. As per suicide statistics provided by National Crime Records Bureau, for the years 2005 and 2006, close to 52, 000 and 56, 000 married men committed suicide respectively. And the same years noted a splurge in the number of dowry harassment cases filed as reflected in the number of such cases filed – 58319 and 63128. Coupled with that, if a study conducted by Center for Social Research on the conviction rate of such cases is anything to go by, it shockingly reveals that there is only 2 % conviction in such cases. This means 98 % of such cases are false, and thus a false claim of dowry harassment was made.
Not only that, based on that false statement, the husband and his entire family was arrested, put behind bars, made to cough out huge amounts to get a bail and had no choice but to fight a legal battle in an otherwise defunct and dead judicial outreach and was also subjected to malicious prosecution. For the charge of dowry harassment being false, the concocted stories of alleged torture would also bear no ground. Having thus said, section 498A IPC, being heavily misused has actually turned out into an assassin’s weapon rather a protector’s shield as rightly pointed out by the Honorable Supreme Court of India. Instead of making families, it is breaking families, for any woman who has falsely implicated her husband and in – laws in a false criminal case has lost their trust and the marriage has been dead for all practical purposes.
A recent study in Mumbai claimed 40 % of marriages registered in Mumbai end in a divorce. And most of such cases involve filing of a false dowry case in order to get a quick divorce with a hefty alimony. Unscrupulous girls, supported by ill – minded parents, especially mother, pampered by a biased legal system who is highly de – sensitized to husbands (read married men) have found this as a very easy way to earn tax – free money. And to add to that all of those so called marriages have been performed on some auspicious date / time in consultation with some purohit / pundit etc.
When marriages could last so strongly for ages down the memory lane, and those too were conducted on some auspicious date / time in consultation with some purohit / pundit etc., what has changed so drastically in recent times that marriages have become a source of business opportunity for women and a source of ignominy and stress for men? Save Indian Family Foundation, the single largest NGO committed to the cause of spreading the message of Gender Equity and Family Harmony in addition to providing free legal, moral and psychological support to the victims of false dowry harassment and Domestic Violence cases, receives on an average of 200 calls a week over its various help lines spread all over India and abroad as well from battered and harassed men who are either victims of the misuse of these laws or are subjected to Domestic Violence at the hands of their wives.
Have we come of the time to consult a lawyer rather than a pundit or a purohit to decide a marital knot? Especially a male does need to do so before tying the knot. For if the marriage does not work (which is quite possible in today’s dynamic socio – economic scenario), he will have to bear the brunt of the fallacy. A false case lodged with the help of the corrupt police force, sleeping judiciary and mercenary lawyers robs the man of his health, wealth, life, career and happiness. Even with a low conviction rate, the mental trauma that the man and his family including his mother and sisters and his father and other relatives undergo cannot be described in words and is by no means less than actual conviction.
But does life end there? Is the end of marriage, the end of life? Perhaps yes, but probably no. Looking at the alarmingly high and surprisingly suppressed suicide statistics of married males as mentioned in the first paragraph, it is probably true that for married males, end of marriage is end of life. But seeing the spirits of a few thousand volunteers at Save Indian Family Foundation, reality shifts. Here people have not only gathered strength to fight against the system and stride against the tide, but have also developed high amount of positivity in their life and learned to remain happy despite a despicable and pathetic married life.
Marriage can definitely be the first step towards family foundation but cannot substitute life itself. Life is too big and diverse and there are many things to be done in life than to waste it in crying over the split milk called a bad marriage. Like the volunteers at Save Indian Family Foundation has taken cudgels against not only the biased laws and their faulty implementation but also against the mindset that a woman will not break away from a marriage without justifiable reason. This is a bitter truth which the society needs to know, imbibe and live with it, till the time it refuses to change itself.
Saturday, July 26, 2008
Wednesday, July 09, 2008
Sex in the boardroom!- Can a female actually exploit a man?
Sex in the boardroom!
9 Jul 2008, 0055 hrs IST, PALLAVI TYAGI
“When a man talks dirty to a woman, its sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man, it's $3.95 per minute”
The famous Steven Wright quote seems to be quite paradoxical, especially in the light of a recent Australian survey. According to the survey, it’s not only women who face sexual harassment at work places; men also have to go through the unwanted office vixenry. Remember Michael Douglas in Disclosure or Akshay Kumar in the desi version Aitraaz? The study also states that many men are sexually harassed by women at work but are afraid to complain to their bosses. And even if they complain about their bosses, they are more likely to be told they are actually lucky to be ogled and hassled!
This couldn’t be closer to the truth, at least where India Inc is concerned. We spoke to a cross-section of people on the issue and the reactions were, well, surprising, to say the least! Read on...
What’s going on in that cubicle?
“Yes. I agree that sex has entered the boardroom big time. Males are actually facing sexual pestering by female bosses and colleagues.” says ex. lieutenant Rita Gangwani, carefully avoiding the words harassment and exploitation.
“Since time immemorial, man has been the ruler and female just a follower. But with changing times, the new age women are getting much empowered. They are rubbing shoulders with men and doing much better in most of the fields. So, such sexual advances can be about flaunting, exercising power and not actually about sex, “she further exemplifies.
Supports producer of a leading sports channel, “Behind the scenes of every male life, there are instances (though very few) when they come across such a boss. But, to be very honest, if it exists then it’s a win-win situation for him.”
For most people, however, sexual harassment of a man by a woman is inane, to say the least. “A hidden world of sexual harassment, with female managers exploiting their power over men in the office, seems very unreal. See, especially in the desi context, sex is a very hush-hush thing and not something easily available. So, in such situation even if a man gets such a proposition, he can just not mind it. This stands true even if he doesn’t get any materialistic favours from his female boss in return. Where is the issue?” questions COO of a renowned Internet-solution company.
Pallavi Shekhar, sales manager, Idea Cellular Ltd, shares a similar opinion, “We all know how grapevines work at workplace. She would gain instant fame in and out the office. Why would a female herself opt for a situation in which everyone in the office and even in the industry think of her as a bimbo? No matter how modern a woman is - image matters a lot.”
Can a female actually exploit a man?
“Not really,” says Rita Gangwani, making us understand why she avoided the word harassment, “I would call it sexual convenience for both. A female at a top notch position might be looking for some emotional backing. Women get emotionally involved the minute they enter a physical alliance; for them, ‘No-strings-attached’ also comes with a thin, white strand. In such cases, women get the much needed emotional refuge, flattering compliments and a dedicated escort and men get promotions/raises along with casual sex. It’s just a pact.”
“If there is Sex & Sum (money) then it will be total 'advantage men’. The reason for this is that sex is not open in our country,” asserts the sports channel producer.
So, does that mean men see such proposals as just another opportunity to carve a notch on the bedpost and get some “perks”? When, Pratish Aggrawal, a software developer working with Infosys, was asked if he has ever been harassed a female boss, colleague, he replied, "No, but I'd like to be”. Oops point taken! However, Pratish is quick to cover up, “Look men are not that sensitive. They do not consider mockery, sexual jokes, and lewd suggestions from female co-workers as harassment. Also, we have been taught from childhood that real men aren't victims – so we can surely find a way out.”
According to psychologist Dr Sanjay Chugh: “Men usually are more causal about sex but that has nothing to do with exploitation. A female boss asking for sexual favours may be a pleasant thing if the man finds that sex is worth the gain that he might get, or if he finds the boss sexually attractive. But if one doesn’t find the boss attractive, if one's value systems are different, it can be pure torture to even contemplate such a proposition. Sex with anyone can be casual and fun if it comes out of free choice. In this situation, it no longer remains casual.”
Legally speaking!
ACP Sanjay Tyagi says that in his entire carrier span he hasn’t “even heard of” any case wherein a male has registered a FIR against a female colleague or boss for sexual assault.
Anukul Raj, advocate, Supreme Court, explains, “There are no detailed and specific laws to deal with male harassment. We just have sections like Section 377 and Section 375 that deal with offence like sodomy and forced sexual acts.”
Highlighting the prejudice a male may face in harassment cases, he says: “In case a woman complains of a sexual assault, her word of mouth is considered as the proof and the onus of establishing that the convict is innocent is on the defense. However, if a male makes such a complaint, the onus of proving the assault is on the prosecution.” The lawyer further adds that he hasn’t heard of or fought any such case yet.
Exploring the reason for inhibitions on the part of a male sufferer, Dr Chugh explains, “We have to understand here that for a male it can be very difficult to come up with such a complaint because of the shame or embarrassment associated with it (just as it would be tough for a female). What makes it more difficult is the mindset (result of years of conditioning) that man is superior and more powerful. Men are still getting used to having women as bosses...accepting that they are sexually dominant too is something more difficult.”
pallavi.tyagi@indiatimes.co.in
9 Jul 2008, 0055 hrs IST, PALLAVI TYAGI
“When a man talks dirty to a woman, its sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man, it's $3.95 per minute”
The famous Steven Wright quote seems to be quite paradoxical, especially in the light of a recent Australian survey. According to the survey, it’s not only women who face sexual harassment at work places; men also have to go through the unwanted office vixenry. Remember Michael Douglas in Disclosure or Akshay Kumar in the desi version Aitraaz? The study also states that many men are sexually harassed by women at work but are afraid to complain to their bosses. And even if they complain about their bosses, they are more likely to be told they are actually lucky to be ogled and hassled!
This couldn’t be closer to the truth, at least where India Inc is concerned. We spoke to a cross-section of people on the issue and the reactions were, well, surprising, to say the least! Read on...
What’s going on in that cubicle?
“Yes. I agree that sex has entered the boardroom big time. Males are actually facing sexual pestering by female bosses and colleagues.” says ex. lieutenant Rita Gangwani, carefully avoiding the words harassment and exploitation.
“Since time immemorial, man has been the ruler and female just a follower. But with changing times, the new age women are getting much empowered. They are rubbing shoulders with men and doing much better in most of the fields. So, such sexual advances can be about flaunting, exercising power and not actually about sex, “she further exemplifies.
Supports producer of a leading sports channel, “Behind the scenes of every male life, there are instances (though very few) when they come across such a boss. But, to be very honest, if it exists then it’s a win-win situation for him.”
For most people, however, sexual harassment of a man by a woman is inane, to say the least. “A hidden world of sexual harassment, with female managers exploiting their power over men in the office, seems very unreal. See, especially in the desi context, sex is a very hush-hush thing and not something easily available. So, in such situation even if a man gets such a proposition, he can just not mind it. This stands true even if he doesn’t get any materialistic favours from his female boss in return. Where is the issue?” questions COO of a renowned Internet-solution company.
Pallavi Shekhar, sales manager, Idea Cellular Ltd, shares a similar opinion, “We all know how grapevines work at workplace. She would gain instant fame in and out the office. Why would a female herself opt for a situation in which everyone in the office and even in the industry think of her as a bimbo? No matter how modern a woman is - image matters a lot.”
Can a female actually exploit a man?
“Not really,” says Rita Gangwani, making us understand why she avoided the word harassment, “I would call it sexual convenience for both. A female at a top notch position might be looking for some emotional backing. Women get emotionally involved the minute they enter a physical alliance; for them, ‘No-strings-attached’ also comes with a thin, white strand. In such cases, women get the much needed emotional refuge, flattering compliments and a dedicated escort and men get promotions/raises along with casual sex. It’s just a pact.”
“If there is Sex & Sum (money) then it will be total 'advantage men’. The reason for this is that sex is not open in our country,” asserts the sports channel producer.
So, does that mean men see such proposals as just another opportunity to carve a notch on the bedpost and get some “perks”? When, Pratish Aggrawal, a software developer working with Infosys, was asked if he has ever been harassed a female boss, colleague, he replied, "No, but I'd like to be”. Oops point taken! However, Pratish is quick to cover up, “Look men are not that sensitive. They do not consider mockery, sexual jokes, and lewd suggestions from female co-workers as harassment. Also, we have been taught from childhood that real men aren't victims – so we can surely find a way out.”
According to psychologist Dr Sanjay Chugh: “Men usually are more causal about sex but that has nothing to do with exploitation. A female boss asking for sexual favours may be a pleasant thing if the man finds that sex is worth the gain that he might get, or if he finds the boss sexually attractive. But if one doesn’t find the boss attractive, if one's value systems are different, it can be pure torture to even contemplate such a proposition. Sex with anyone can be casual and fun if it comes out of free choice. In this situation, it no longer remains casual.”
Legally speaking!
ACP Sanjay Tyagi says that in his entire carrier span he hasn’t “even heard of” any case wherein a male has registered a FIR against a female colleague or boss for sexual assault.
Anukul Raj, advocate, Supreme Court, explains, “There are no detailed and specific laws to deal with male harassment. We just have sections like Section 377 and Section 375 that deal with offence like sodomy and forced sexual acts.”
Highlighting the prejudice a male may face in harassment cases, he says: “In case a woman complains of a sexual assault, her word of mouth is considered as the proof and the onus of establishing that the convict is innocent is on the defense. However, if a male makes such a complaint, the onus of proving the assault is on the prosecution.” The lawyer further adds that he hasn’t heard of or fought any such case yet.
Exploring the reason for inhibitions on the part of a male sufferer, Dr Chugh explains, “We have to understand here that for a male it can be very difficult to come up with such a complaint because of the shame or embarrassment associated with it (just as it would be tough for a female). What makes it more difficult is the mindset (result of years of conditioning) that man is superior and more powerful. Men are still getting used to having women as bosses...accepting that they are sexually dominant too is something more difficult.”
pallavi.tyagi@indiatimes.co.in
Tuesday, July 08, 2008
TN women cops use third degree to solve wedding woes
TN women cops use third degree to solve wedding woes
Press Trust Of India
Published on Tue, Jul 08, 2008 at 15:00 in Nation section
Chennai: Amid allegations that officers of all women police stations in Tamil Nadu were resorting to third-degree methods during inquiries on matrimonial disputes, Madras High Court has ordered that the local police officials should obtain permission from SP to effect arrests and set guidelines to be followed in such cases.
Justice R Regupathi, hearing a petition submitted by a person on Monday that he was violently beaten up by a woman police officer in connection with a matrimonial case, observed that "every one expected that all women police stations would be conciliation centres for re-union. But the actual experience divulged that even minor disputes due to family misunderstandings are given colour of a crime."
He said "in fact helpless women are encouraged to come forward with a case with grave allegations against the husband and his family, invariably dragging all family members to police station and subjecting them to ignominy and disgrace."
"There are some instances where arrests are strategically planned to harass the accused and his family so as to make the succumb to the horror of being imprisoned. Such arrests are in ariably plotted at the weekend particularly on Fridays so that they cannot even apply for bail for next two days," he said.
The Judge added "there were many reports of married sisters of husbands, even though they are pregnant or with baby in hands, are summoned and brought to the stations in the name for inquiry and ruthlessly harassed."
Justice Regupathi suggested that except in cases of dowry death, suicide and offences of serious nature, the station house officers of All Women Police Stations should register FIR only on approval of the Dowry Prohibition Officer (DPO) concerned.
The Judge said social workers or mediators with experience may be nominated and housed in the same premises of All Women Police Stations along with the DPOs.
Arrest in matrimonial disputes, in particular arrest of aged, infirm, sick persons and minors, shall not be made by the Station House Officers, the Judge said adding that if arrest was necessary during investigation, sanction must be obtained from the Superintendent of Police concerned by forwarding the reasons recorded in writing.
The chargesheet must be filed within a period of 30 days from the date of registration of the FIR and in case of failure, extension of time shall be sought from the jurisdiction magistrate indicating the reasons for the delay.
A different uniform other than the one for regular police force may be recommended for these police officers, the Judge added.
Saturday, June 21, 2008
Men wail on Renuka’s shoulders
Men wail on Renuka’s shoulders
CHARU SUDAN KASTURI
Renuka Chowdhary
New Delhi, June 20: Women and child development minister Renuka Chowdhary has called a first-of-its-kind-meeting with male activists demanding modifications to laws that they claim are flawed and biased against men.
Top ministry officials said they do not expect Chowdhary to yield to the demand from male groups for “gender-equal” laws, though some of their proposals may be considered. Instead, the minister could use the forum to try and explain to men “the need for laws favouring women”.
The groups argue that the laws against dowry and domestic violence against women as well as the proposed “sexual harassment at the workplace” legislation are discriminatory against men and open to misuse.
The meeting, scheduled for June 25, will be held at the India Islamic Cultural Centre in Delhi. Over a hundred male activists have been invited, ministry sources said.
In the past seven months, the ministry has thrice drawn up plans to organise the meeting, but these were cancelled by Chowdhary. Though the official reason given was that unplanned commitments had cropped up, sources close to the minister said she wanted to be “fully prepared” with legal advice.
“Now that the minister is ready, we are hosting the meeting at a public location where the media will be allowed, because we have nothing to shy away from,” an official said.
Swarup Sarkar, the co-ordinator of Save Family Foundation, an umbrella group of men’s organisations that works in cohesion with similar groups abroad, said he had not received an invite.
“This is a landmark meeting, and the minister, on earlier occasions, had promised us she would invite us. An official from the ministry has informed us about the meeting, but we have not received any official invitation,” he said.
An office-bearer of Rakshak Foundation — a group of NRI men from across the world campaigning against India’s dowry law — said they had not received an invitation either.
The concept note for the June 25 meet lists some of the key changes that the men’s groups want. The words “woman” and “man” should be replaced with “person” in the proposed law against harassment at work. Similarly, “victim” and “accused” should replace “wife” and “husband” in the domestic violence law, they have demanded.
The anti-dowry law is frequently misused, the men say. At present, it is mandatory for police to arrest all the accused named by the woman or her family before even starting investigations. The men’s groups want either prima facie evidence to be made necessary for any arrests or a provision to punish the complainant if the charges are found mala fide.
CHARU SUDAN KASTURI
Renuka Chowdhary
New Delhi, June 20: Women and child development minister Renuka Chowdhary has called a first-of-its-kind-meeting with male activists demanding modifications to laws that they claim are flawed and biased against men.
Top ministry officials said they do not expect Chowdhary to yield to the demand from male groups for “gender-equal” laws, though some of their proposals may be considered. Instead, the minister could use the forum to try and explain to men “the need for laws favouring women”.
The groups argue that the laws against dowry and domestic violence against women as well as the proposed “sexual harassment at the workplace” legislation are discriminatory against men and open to misuse.
The meeting, scheduled for June 25, will be held at the India Islamic Cultural Centre in Delhi. Over a hundred male activists have been invited, ministry sources said.
In the past seven months, the ministry has thrice drawn up plans to organise the meeting, but these were cancelled by Chowdhary. Though the official reason given was that unplanned commitments had cropped up, sources close to the minister said she wanted to be “fully prepared” with legal advice.
“Now that the minister is ready, we are hosting the meeting at a public location where the media will be allowed, because we have nothing to shy away from,” an official said.
Swarup Sarkar, the co-ordinator of Save Family Foundation, an umbrella group of men’s organisations that works in cohesion with similar groups abroad, said he had not received an invite.
“This is a landmark meeting, and the minister, on earlier occasions, had promised us she would invite us. An official from the ministry has informed us about the meeting, but we have not received any official invitation,” he said.
An office-bearer of Rakshak Foundation — a group of NRI men from across the world campaigning against India’s dowry law — said they had not received an invitation either.
The concept note for the June 25 meet lists some of the key changes that the men’s groups want. The words “woman” and “man” should be replaced with “person” in the proposed law against harassment at work. Similarly, “victim” and “accused” should replace “wife” and “husband” in the domestic violence law, they have demanded.
The anti-dowry law is frequently misused, the men say. At present, it is mandatory for police to arrest all the accused named by the woman or her family before even starting investigations. The men’s groups want either prima facie evidence to be made necessary for any arrests or a provision to punish the complainant if the charges are found mala fide.
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Hindu Marriages Act breaking more homes than uniting: SC
Hindu Marriages Act breaking more homes than uniting: SC
17 Jun 2008, 1825 hrs IST,PTI
NEW DELHI: Expressing concern over an increasing number of divorce cases flooding the courts, the Supreme Court on Tuesday observed that the Hindu Marriages Act had done more harm to the family system in the country than strengthening it.
"The Hindu Marriages Act has broken more homes than uniting," a vacation Bench of Justices Arijit Pasayat and G S Singhvi observed.
The apex court regretted that the growing number of divorce cases in the country was having a disastrous effect on children of families which get broken in such a manner.
Enacted in 1955, the Hindu Marriages Act which had undergone several amendments till 2003 contains various provisions for validity of a Hindu marriage, restitution of conjugal rights and divorce, the latter being a concept evolved from the English law.
"Even at the time of marriages, anticipatory divorce petitions are being filed," the Bench remarked sarcastically.
The apex court passed the observation while dealing with a petition filed by a divorcee for seeking his child's custody.
"Ego should get dissolved for the sake of the child," the Bench remarked even as the separated parents tried to air their views.
The apex court told the separated couple that it was more concerned with the welfare of the child, rather than the mutual recrimination between the two.
"Ultimately the child suffers. If it is a girl the trauma is more, particularly at the time of the marriage of such children," Justice Pasayat speaking for the Bench observed.
The apex court lamented that the provisions provided in the Hindu Marriages Act for granting divorce on the grounds of spouses suffering from diseases like leprosy, mental illness were being misused by some couples.
"In those days our forefathers never had such problems," the apex court observed while stating that marital disputes during the olden days were sorted out within the four walls of the house.
In this case, Gaurav Nagpal through counsel Manik Karanjawala had sought custody of his 11-year old son.
Nagpal had filed the appeal after the trial court and the Delhi High Court had both granted the custody of the boy to his estranged wife Sumedha Nagpal.
There was high drama during the hearing of the case when Gaurav asked his wife to give him an hour time to sort out certain differences between.
But even before the court could give its views on the plea, Sumedha bluntly rejected the idea.
"It's just an eyewash your Lordship. He has been beating me and my father," Sumedha told the Bench, which however, said that it would not go into the merits of the case at this juncture.
Instead, the Bench said it would personally talk to the couple in chamber during the afternoon.
The matter was also listed for further hearing on Wednesday.
17 Jun 2008, 1825 hrs IST,PTI
NEW DELHI: Expressing concern over an increasing number of divorce cases flooding the courts, the Supreme Court on Tuesday observed that the Hindu Marriages Act had done more harm to the family system in the country than strengthening it.
"The Hindu Marriages Act has broken more homes than uniting," a vacation Bench of Justices Arijit Pasayat and G S Singhvi observed.
The apex court regretted that the growing number of divorce cases in the country was having a disastrous effect on children of families which get broken in such a manner.
Enacted in 1955, the Hindu Marriages Act which had undergone several amendments till 2003 contains various provisions for validity of a Hindu marriage, restitution of conjugal rights and divorce, the latter being a concept evolved from the English law.
"Even at the time of marriages, anticipatory divorce petitions are being filed," the Bench remarked sarcastically.
The apex court passed the observation while dealing with a petition filed by a divorcee for seeking his child's custody.
"Ego should get dissolved for the sake of the child," the Bench remarked even as the separated parents tried to air their views.
The apex court told the separated couple that it was more concerned with the welfare of the child, rather than the mutual recrimination between the two.
"Ultimately the child suffers. If it is a girl the trauma is more, particularly at the time of the marriage of such children," Justice Pasayat speaking for the Bench observed.
The apex court lamented that the provisions provided in the Hindu Marriages Act for granting divorce on the grounds of spouses suffering from diseases like leprosy, mental illness were being misused by some couples.
"In those days our forefathers never had such problems," the apex court observed while stating that marital disputes during the olden days were sorted out within the four walls of the house.
In this case, Gaurav Nagpal through counsel Manik Karanjawala had sought custody of his 11-year old son.
Nagpal had filed the appeal after the trial court and the Delhi High Court had both granted the custody of the boy to his estranged wife Sumedha Nagpal.
There was high drama during the hearing of the case when Gaurav asked his wife to give him an hour time to sort out certain differences between.
But even before the court could give its views on the plea, Sumedha bluntly rejected the idea.
"It's just an eyewash your Lordship. He has been beating me and my father," Sumedha told the Bench, which however, said that it would not go into the merits of the case at this juncture.
Instead, the Bench said it would personally talk to the couple in chamber during the afternoon.
The matter was also listed for further hearing on Wednesday.
Saturday, June 14, 2008
Just putting sindoor not enough, go the whole hog to be legally wed, rules court
Utkarsh AnandPosted online: Saturday , June 07, 2008 at 11:00:30Updated: Saturday , June 07, 2008 at 11:00:30
Print Email To Editor Post Comments
New Delhi, June 6 Simply putting ‘sindoor’ (vermillion) on a woman’s head might work as ‘proof’ of a quick-fix wedding for Bollywood potboilers, but the law does not grant sanctity to such a “marriage”, a city court has observed.
According to Additional Sessions Judge (ASJ) Bimla Kumari, the other nuts and bolts of wedding, as laid down in the Hindu Marriage Act (HMA), have to be followed for the matrimony to get legal sanction.
“Merely putting sindoor in the parting of a girl does not give a title to a man to be (her) husband,” ASJ Kumari ruled in a recent case. “For a marriage, the ‘saptapadi ceremony’ has to be performed under the Hindu Marriage Act.”
The Act, the legislation of laws relating to marriages among Hindus, says that a wedding is “complete” only after the customary rites and ceremonies, including the “saptapadi” (seven steps taken by groom and bride in front of the sacred fire). The court observed that the marriage becomes “complete and binding” only after the seventh step is taken.
The court’s observation came while deciding a case against a man accused of kidnapping a girl to Uttarakhand and raping her.
As the woman — she was found to be over 18 years, and thus of marriageable age — stood by the accused, the court acquitted him of abduction charges. But when ASJ Kumari was to settle on the rape charge, the woman told the judge that he had applied “sindoor” on her forehead in March last with intention to get married. “We made God the witness of our relationship,” the woman contended.
The court acquitted the man of rape charge, as the woman was mature and legally capable of consenting to physical relationship, but refused to acknowledge the wedding. Noting that the girl had admitted that barring the sindoor bit no wedding rituals were performed, ASJ Kumari said they could not be lawfully married under the Hindu Marriage Act. “For a marriage, the ‘saptapadi ceremony’ has to be performed, which is not performed in the present case,” the court observed, while releasing the accused. “It means they were not legally wedded.”
Print Email To Editor Post Comments
New Delhi, June 6 Simply putting ‘sindoor’ (vermillion) on a woman’s head might work as ‘proof’ of a quick-fix wedding for Bollywood potboilers, but the law does not grant sanctity to such a “marriage”, a city court has observed.
According to Additional Sessions Judge (ASJ) Bimla Kumari, the other nuts and bolts of wedding, as laid down in the Hindu Marriage Act (HMA), have to be followed for the matrimony to get legal sanction.
“Merely putting sindoor in the parting of a girl does not give a title to a man to be (her) husband,” ASJ Kumari ruled in a recent case. “For a marriage, the ‘saptapadi ceremony’ has to be performed under the Hindu Marriage Act.”
The Act, the legislation of laws relating to marriages among Hindus, says that a wedding is “complete” only after the customary rites and ceremonies, including the “saptapadi” (seven steps taken by groom and bride in front of the sacred fire). The court observed that the marriage becomes “complete and binding” only after the seventh step is taken.
The court’s observation came while deciding a case against a man accused of kidnapping a girl to Uttarakhand and raping her.
As the woman — she was found to be over 18 years, and thus of marriageable age — stood by the accused, the court acquitted him of abduction charges. But when ASJ Kumari was to settle on the rape charge, the woman told the judge that he had applied “sindoor” on her forehead in March last with intention to get married. “We made God the witness of our relationship,” the woman contended.
The court acquitted the man of rape charge, as the woman was mature and legally capable of consenting to physical relationship, but refused to acknowledge the wedding. Noting that the girl had admitted that barring the sindoor bit no wedding rituals were performed, ASJ Kumari said they could not be lawfully married under the Hindu Marriage Act. “For a marriage, the ‘saptapadi ceremony’ has to be performed, which is not performed in the present case,” the court observed, while releasing the accused. “It means they were not legally wedded.”
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
Children's Rights Initiative for Shared Parenting (CRISP)
Rally demanding Children’s Right on 14th June 2008
http://www.citizens4crisp.org/
Contact: 98452 64488, 93428 53272, 9243473794
PRESS RELEASE
On Saturday, 14th June 2008, Children’s Rights Initiative for Shared Parenting (CRISP) protest in front of Mahatma Gandhi Statue, MG Road demanding the children rights. People from all walks of life including Software engineers, Doctors, NRI’s and Businessmen will participate in this protest.
CRISP is a Non Governmental Organization(NGO) founded recently by a group of citizens, who recognize the serious effects of “parental alienation” on children due to single parent families on account of divorce or separation. CRISP also focuses on furthering the rights of a children to remain connected with both parents. While most NGOs pertaining to children deal with issues related to child labour, education etc we deal with issues related to unquestionable right of children to be cared for by both biological parents.
Our aims and objectives are based on research findings worldwide which indicate that children do best when both parents are actively involved in their lives, even after separation or divorce. We believe that conflict between parents will get reduced and the mental and emotional health of children will improve, when divorcing parents can be assured of equal and meaningful contact with their children with mutual cooperation.
According to CRISP, Parents contemplating divorce should be given manadatory counselling on “shared parenting” and the benefits there of by a panel of experts supervised by the family court. This will eliminate unnecessary child custody battles and stress to the parents and the child and also wasting of precious time of the courts.
Parental alienation occurs, when one parent disallows the other parent from communicating with their children for personal vendetta. The dominant parent then brainwashes the child against the other parent, assuring the child that it is all right to ignore the other parent.” This brings a lot mental distress and trauma to the child and the alienated parent.
Indian legal system is still based on patriarchal mindset, which considers fathers as not capable of nurturing the children. However, today many fathers are competent of taking care of the needs of the children for normal upbringing. When women can multitask by going to work after domestic chores and also take care of children, it is baseless to say that men/fathers are not capable of taking care of children. With rise in number of working parents in nuclear family setup, father’s involvement in raising the children is a must. Otherwise, the child is simply left at the mercy of servants and strangers in day care centers and exposed to all sorts of child abuse.
The mindsets in Indian legal system has to change by taking account of the current social situation. Shared parenting is recognised in many western countries.
CRISP demands an Early Intervention Project where divorcing parents would have to meet with a panel of experts to clarify issues such as custody, finance, education and children’s upbringing before proceeding with the divorce decree.
“Studies have shown that children who go through their parents’ divorce have
symptoms of psychological maladjustment,
lower academic achievement,
social difficulties and problematic relationships with both parents.
To make matters worse, many parents often influence their children to choose one parent over the other and this is often traumatic for the child and this cruelty on the children has to be stopped immediately.
Strengthen Fatherhood and Families: Since 1960, the number of American children without fathers in their lives has quadrupled, from 6 million to more than 24 million. Children without fathers in their lives are five times more likely to live in poverty and commit crime, nine times more likely to drop out of school, and 20 times more likely to end up in prison. As the proverb goes,“One father is better than 100 teachers.”
In United States of America, Statistics reported tells that Children from fatherless homes are:
5 times more likely to commit suicide
32 times more likely to run away from home.
20 times more likely to have behavioral disorders
14 times more likely to commit rape.
9 times more likely to drop out of high school.
10 times more likely to abuse chemical substances (become drug addicts)
9 times more likely to end up in a state-operated institution
20 times more likely to end up in prison.
3 million teenage girls have sexually transmitted diseases
At least 1 out of 4 teenagers (between 14years to 19years) suffers from sexually transmitted diseases.
It is important for all citizens of the nation to wake up to stop a future social catastrophe as it has happened in western countries. We have to learn from the social experiments in America and Europe and stop repeating the mistakes western countries did in last 30 years. Today, billions of dollars are spent in those countries to tackle the behavioural problems. In fact, this is a major issue in most election campaigns in those countries as billions are spent on it. If a child is denied care of father as at present and if India becomes a fatherless society, then it will simply create more criminals, rapists and drug addicts in next 15 years (as shown in the statistics above). The entire social fabric and culture will be in ruins and the damage will be irreversible to our society. So, CRISP members want to stop this social catastrophe and save the future generations from narrow mindsets.
CRISP is dedicated in putting efforts to the creation of a judicial system, legislative system, and public awareness, which promotes equal rights for ALL parties affected by divorce and the breakup of a family keeping in mind the best interests of the child.
As custody battles between parents increase, counselling of separating or divorced parents can have a positive effect on the overall development of the child.
CRISP wants to highlight:
That joint custody is the best outcome for children whose parents are separated. Child needs the support of both biological parents. Both biological parents should be responsible for the emotional and psychological well-being of their children.
That “Interparental Child Abduction” is Child Abuse. Often one parent takes the child to another country without the permission of the other parents or the courts. It is known as parental abduction and is a criminal act under international laws including Hague Convention.
That the practice of alienating the child from the other parent is Child Abuse.
That grandparents should have rights and access to their grandchildren.
That gender bias should be eliminated from family law and from future legislation.
That parties should resist from using gender biased laws to wreak vengeance on the non-custodial parent.
Demands by CRISP - Children’s Rights Initiative for Shared Parenting:
Ensuring meaningful and balanced participation of both parents in the lives of children in case of separation of the parents.
Single mothers should be given mandatory counselling to increase involvement of biological father in the child’s life.
Existing visitation schedules to increase and enhance the role of “non-custodial parents” in the best interest of the child.
Reforms in the existing child custody laws, practices for equal parenting sensitised to consider child’s ne.
50% of the custody to be given to the fathers.
Govt must allocate funds for conducting research on the adverse impact on fatherless children.
Creating a Ministry for children by separating the existing Women and Child (WCD) ministry. A separate union minister for children must be appointed.
On 14th June, CRISP activists from various parts of India will conduct a massive protest in front of Gandhi Statue, on MG Road Bangalore. The time of the protest is from 10:00am till 1:00pm. About 150 to 200 men, women, elders and children are expected to participate in the protest. There are 30 to 40 men and women traveling from Hyderabad, Chennai and other parts of South India to participate in this protest. Most of them are scientists, NRIs, Software Engineers, Doctors and Business persons. The protests will be held every month in different parts of India till Indian parliament amends the laws to Save Indian Children and prevent social catastroph in future.
Wednesday, June 04, 2008
To the WCD Ministry
Honorable Ministers,
As a citizen of India, I seek an answer to the following questions:-
- As per NCRB data every year, 56000 married men are committing suicide every year on an average. If a married woman dies, it by default assumed to be a dowry death and the whole family of husbands is thrown in to jail. Whereas for a husband death it is just marked off as another death and no action is taken. So is the value of a man's life any less than a woman's life? Or is it that the pain of a mother / sister losing her son / brother is out of the ambit of the purview of these ministries?
- Why is there no clause of punishment for people filing false cases under section 498A and 3 & 4 DP Act and Domestic Violence Act 2005 and 125 CrPC?
- Why is section 498A violating the basic principles of Human Rights as laid down by Amnesty International and assumes the accused 'Guilty until proven innocent'?
- As per NCRB data, 1, 00,000 innocent women have been arrested under section 498A IPC and Section 3 & 4 DP Act, without any trial, merely on the basis of allegations. What action has your concerned ministry taken in this regard to ensure that the offenders are booked and such actions are not repeated in future?
- Day in and day out, we here cases of senior citizens being evicted out of their own dream home, built out of life - savings by their unscrupulous Daughter -in - law. What has your concerned ministry done to redress the grievances of those mothers who lost their home, their abode in their dusky days to the misuse of a system badly implemented?
- DV Act is termed Ultra - Vires the Constitution of India as it advocates conviction of a person on sole testimony of complainants and violating Article 13 of the Indian Constitution which says, "All citizens are equal in the eyes of law". So has your concerned ministry taken steps to redress the same loophole? If not, why so? And if there are any plans, when so?
Tuesday, June 03, 2008
Is it a man's world?
They say it is a man’s world. I disagree. Since childhood men are discriminated against and made to believe that in order to remain happy in this world they have to please the women around, be it their mother, sister, cousins, wives or girlfriends. All histrionics are women – centric and driven by their moods.
If a woman breaks away from a relationship, she is considered liberated and her action is deemed heroic and hailed by one and all, but the same thing done by a man draws only flak. A man does not even get the consideration that he too might be suffering in the relationship and needed a breakthrough, a benefit of doubt women enjoy ubiquitously and as a de – facto privilege. As far as the woman wants to carry on in the relationship, the man is expected to compromise and make the relation work and when she does not want to do the same, allegations are transferred to the man who has to take the blame of the failed relationship and compensate for the same as well and they call it a man’s world.
If a man breaks away from the relationship, the woman is considered a deserted victim and if a woman deserts a man then also the woman is considered as the liberated victim. If a man continues in an abusive relationship he is called an emotional fool and if a woman continues her commitment is lauded and they call it a man’s world.
If a woman looks for a rich and wealthy man she is considered ambitious and concerned for her future. If a man looks out for a wealthy wife, he is termed greedy. If a man shows slyness towards getting married, he is non – social, non – committal and loose – focused in life, but if a woman does the same she is thinking about her life and career. If a woman passes some lewd comments to a man, she is sportive and courageous, but the same thing done by a man becomes a crime attracting strict penalties and they call it a man’s world.
In the olden days girls were shy to speak of their own feelings and it was considered bad to approach women for relationships and we had laws formulated to protect women and it was called the era of women protection. Slowly women became more outspoken and expressed their feelings more vocally and when they felt like ending relationships and started misusing the same laws meant to protect them, we have now what we are witnessing as Women Empowerment. So where do we see a man’s voice or a say in this?
Earlier when men used to initiate divorces, DIVORCE was considered a bad word and a social taboo. Women were provided protection in the form of alimony and maintenance. Seeing it as an easy route to tax – free money, women started initiating divorces leveling false allegations and DIVORCE is no longer considered a bad word!!! If a man is not willing to divorce his wife, he is said to have caused mental torture to the wife by denying divorce, but if a woman refuses to divorce her husband, she is said to have made attempts to save the marriage and they call it a man’s world.
If a married woman dies, the whole family of the husband is put behind bars and denied bail. They are marked off as criminals and booked under IPC Section 304 B (Dowry Death). If a married man dies, the woman is hailed as the victim and gets everyone’s sympathy. Why is the consideration not given to the possibility of the involvement of his wife in his death, when her death is viewed with an assumption of dowry related torture? Even if there are evidences in favor of the man accused, the same are ignored and he is tried for baseless trial and they call it a man’s world.
Men do the most risky jobs in the society, pay 82 % of taxes in India and yet neither do they have a National Commission of Men to redress their grievances nor a Welfare Ministry to look after them. Even we have animal welfare ministries but not one for men. Men are discriminated against in paying taxes as well, for women have additional tax concessions. Every year 1200 crore Rupees and this year 7200 crore Rupees have been allocated to the women ministry. Of this 82 % is paid by men and the same money is used to frame heavily lopsided laws to frame the same men and defame them and abuse them financially and they call it a man’s world.
Even the media is highly sensitized to women’s issues. A complaint of dowry harassment is lodged and the next day, leading dailies carry the news and print it as if the reporters were staying with the couple and put allegations on the man and his family. But for a man’s case either no coverage is given, or some justification is provided to compensate the wrong – doing happening to the man and they call it a man’s world.
Men are mass brainwashed with this euphoria that it a man’s world and so men need to protect women and in this process all that a man does is viewed with suspicion. It is high time we give a second thought to the thought, “Is it really a man’s world?” And “How difficult is it to be a man?”
Sunday, June 01, 2008
Protest in Bangalore on Father's Day - 14th June
It takes a man & a woman to make a relationship, known as marriage and the most beautiful outcome of such a relationship are children; beautiful, innocent, full of life, sweet, charming and hordes of other adjectives can be ascribed to them. But irony seems to have devoured even this aspect of life. Children of late have become a tool to obtain, maintain, and sustain supremacy and ego feeding in relationships. Whenever a relationship worsens, a tussle starts between the warring errant couples to get a good scorecard from their children and try to retain them. Many a times they are used as a blackmailing weapon. Men are threatened of false cases if they make an attempt to meet their children. In such a war of egos, no-one, including the two individuals who brought them to this world together, ever bother to think about the rights and future of the children themselves.
Errant and vindictive mothers are often successful in getting custody of their children, courtesy staunchly feminist nymphomaniac mindset of the judiciary giving in to crocodile tears and false show of motherhood in courts. This deprives two individuals of their rights, the child and the father. A child is deprived of a father’s love, affection and care and the father is forced to strangulate his fatherhood. The society and the judiciary need to be sensitized about the importance of the presence of both the parents for a child’s normal upbringing and in the best interest of the child’s future. USA has shown us the catastrophic effects of creating Fatherless Children and Childless Fathers. Teenage Pregnancy, Alcohol addiction in adolescence, high inclination to crimes and many other ill – effects have come to forth in the American Society, courtesy feminism taking its toll with its anti – men policy. With draconian laws favoring women irrespective of merits in Indian legal scenario, Indian society is moving at dramatic pace towards self – extinction.
CRISP (Child Rights Initiative for Shared Parenting) an initiative taken under the aegis of Save Indian Family Foundation (SIFF) has made its mission to voice the cries of innocent sufferers and sensitize the society about the dire need of both the parents and especially a father in a child’s life. Announcing its launch on 14th June 2008 at Gandhi Statue on MG Road, near Cubbon Park, CRISP invites people to participate in this noble cause and make an attempt to save the society from a potential and impending catastrophe.
Friday, May 30, 2008
Legal Terrorism at its zenith
Mr. Gurpal Singh, a resident of Delhi, recently suffered a heavy personal loss in his life, with his father suffering from a heart attack. The reason the old man died an unnatural death was his daughter –in – law threatening to file cases based on false allegations of dowry harassment and related torture. His daughter-in-law had occupied his own house and thrown them out form their own home one year back and subsequently, his father and mother have to make rounds of the court/police to get back their own home, which failed till date. They even had to spend nights at "Gurudwara" in spite of his own home he made for his old time. Unable to bear the burden of a false allegation of a crime as grave as ‘Dowry Harassment’ and the associated stigma and social ostracization, Gurpal’s father succumbed to the pressure.
Every year 70, 000 cases of dowry harassment are filed and if the data compiled by Centre for Social Research is anything to go by, 98 % of such cases are false, void of merit and filed with an adverse motive of extortion, revenge and an intention of settling petty marital discords. In the last four years 95, 000 innocent women have been arrested solely on the base of allegations of dowry harassment, without any trial being ever conducted. When such a case comes to the police station or any so – called women’s organization, the first thing done is to take the whole family into the ambit of suspicion, without verification of the complaint, including small children and senior citizens, and pregnant sisters.
In case a woman dies within seven years of her marriage, the death is viewed with suspicions of dowry related harassment as a de – facto standard and the whole family of the in – laws are thrust into the prison and denied bail. Such fears have risen to such alarmingly high levels in the society that even the mention of such a threat to file a case can drive any person into deep wells of fear and uncertainty. Gurpal’s father also was going through the same mental phase and not being able to take the pressure, suffered from an emotional breakdown and a son lost his father in the most crucial period of his life.
It is highly disheartening to see the pathetic state men and their families are in currently in the society. Living constantly in a fear of false allegations being leveled against them and washing their lives in a whiff of a moment, some commit suicides, some give way to biological irregularities while more others are compelled to give in to unreasonable, unjustified and illogical demands in lieu of not filing a case. Is the value of a man’s life less than the value of a woman’s life, so much so that the society considers taking their lives as ‘Social Service’ and does not feel any need to take some steps to improve conditions. The daughter – in – law of Gurpal’s father is responsible for his sad demise, and charges of abetment of suicide need to be leveled against her and such a blatant misuse of laws deems punishment. Such acts fall no short of Legal Terrorism.
Save Indian Family Foundation (SIFF) an NGO committed to the cause of spreading awareness of this ongoing Legal Terrorism in the society and helping its victims, seeks to demand police intervention in Gurpal’s father’s sad demise and book the offenders for the crimes committed. A man’s life is not to be wasted like this making it a price of unleashing Legal Terrorism and such a loss needs to be compensated with timely justice. It would be absolutely mandatory to reiterate here that as per National Crime Records Bureau’s Data, every year close to 75, 000 men end their lives in suicide, more than double the number of women, yet men have no protection from the law. In addition to that they are subjected to wide and blatant false allegations and victimized under highly biased legal system plagued with lopsided laws.
Gender biased and draconian laws formed on the basis of highly bloated statistics are coming under high scathing as increasingly they are becoming tools to exercise unwarranted power and control. To add to it they have become legal channels of tax - free money extortion sponsored from tax payers’ hard earned money. SIFF condemns such laws and urges the government to take drastic and timely steps to avoid a social catastrophe turning a civilized society into a jungle of state sponsored Legal Terrorism snuffing lives out of innocent citizens in the dusky days.
Unfortunately if this had been the Father of a girl, all channel would had flashed the News, an old father ends his life for Dowry harassment and the husband's father/mother/sisters/child would havae been put behind the bars, but cases such as these always go un-reported, resulting in more and more elder people loosing their life silently, which it seems that not only the government authorities our media friends also believe to be considered as *"Social service of India" as the DIL killed the FIL.
Thursday, May 29, 2008
`I am relieved' - Prashanth(Tamil Actor & Victim of IPC498a misuse)
Thursday May 29 2008 09:42 IST
Sharadha Narayanan
MARRIAGE is happiness to others, it's been a disaster to me," Prashanth candidly explained as he broke his silence and discussed the trauma surrounding his 3-year marriage with Grihalakshmi.Two days after the police has submitted its investigation to the Metropolitan Magistrate, Saidapet, that reports of harassment by Prashanth to his wife Grihalakshmi was a `mistake of fact', Prashanth seems a relieved man.
When a scribe asked him how he was doing, I'm fine, only now," he jubilantly said.Accusing Grihalakshmi of staging the wedding to cheat him, Prashanth calls himself the biggest victim of Section 498A, which deals with harassment by husband and his relatives and can lead to upto 3 years' imprisonment and fine."What hurts is that my son will be forced to grow in a broken house, which is why I filed a petition asking for his custody," Prashanth added.
Meanwhile, reading from the petition filed by Grihalakshmi against him, the actor said there were accusations that he forced her father to get him an LCD TV while in Malaysia. "Other things that I've supposed to have made them spend includes hair pruning equipment and hair dressing," he said, almost with a smile.
With this police report coming in his favour, things certainly seem to be looking up for the actor. When he was asked if he would accept her if she came back to him, the actor, in a non-committal way, stated that he had waited for too long for a positive response from her. The actor now has two cases that he has filed, pending: one in the matrimonial court seeking to declare the marriage null and void, and one in the criminal court accusing Grihalakshmi of cheating.
Meanwhile, things are also going in his favour in terms of his Kollywood commitments. The actor has six projects waiting to begin and he is awaiting the release of his Pulan Visaranai II this month. Three of his future projects will be under his home banner; one including the remake of his father's yesteryear hit Malaiyoor Mambattiyaan. One other project in the discussion stage is by new director Saroj. The Tamil actor who first got to act with Aishwarya Rai, Rinkie Khanna and many such heroines is eyeing Shriya for that project. "It's almost confirmed," he says.
Prashanth - Meets The Press - Video(Courtesy: Galatta.com)
Prashanth: False dowry harassment case dismissed
Padma Iyer [May 28, 2008, 1:19:02 PM] . Courtesy: http://tamil.galatta.com
Police investigation has revealed that the dowry harassment case filed by Gruhalakshmi on Prashanth is false. Gruhalakshmi and her family members plotted an extortion scheme to get a whopping amount of Rs. 50 crores from Prashanth. They even threatened to file Section 498 A case against him and his family if he failed to comply with their demand of the huge amount. After a detailed investigation, the police of dowry cell, Chennai, found her case baseless and false and dropped the case against Prashanth and his family.
Police investigation has revealed that the dowry harassment case filed by Gruhalakshmi on Prashanth is false. Gruhalakshmi and her family members plotted an extortion scheme to get a whopping amount of Rs. 50 crores from Prashanth. They even threatened to file Section 498 A case against him and his family if he failed to comply with their demand of the huge amount. After a detailed investigation, the police of dowry cell, Chennai, found her case baseless and false and dropped the case against Prashanth and his family.
My case is a classic example of how 498 A IPC is misused- Prashant
Actor breathes easy
On May 23, the Saidapet Court, acquitted actor Prashanth of all charges filed against him by his wife Grihalakshmi, who according to the police had misrepresented facts and accused him of dowry harassment case.
On May 23, the Saidapet Court, acquitted actor Prashanth of all charges filed against him by his wife Grihalakshmi, who according to the police had misrepresented facts and accused him of dowry harassment case.
Breaking his three-year-long silence on the issue, Prashanth said, “My case is a classic example of how Section 498 A of the IPC, which protects women against dowry harassment has been misused (by my wife Grihalakshmi). The actor, who was accompanied by his lawyer P.Anand said, “Despite her giving false testimonies to the media and tarnishing my image, I never reacted against her as she was going to bear my child at that time. To my shock, she was already married to someone else. I sourced all documents to substantiate this and I did not go to the media. Instead, I resorted to the law in which I have immense faith.” When asked about his son, the actor said, “I want him back. I have filed a petition with regard to this and I am going to fight for him.”
Thursday, May 22, 2008
Article in Sakal Times- FIGHTING SPIRIT - 56-year-old joins law school
To Fight cases to save men and families troubled by scheming wives
Mumbai:
While other men of his age eagerly anticipate the retirement years or enjoy the company of their families, Mohanlal Gupta (56) pores over piles of heavy law books. The former IITian is not studying to add to his skills, but out of a humane necessity to save men and families troubled by scheming wives.
“I am the oldest student in the Siddharth Law College, even older than the principal by 15 days,” laughs Gupta, who spearheads the Mumbai chapter of the Save Indian Family Foundation (SIFF), which has been helping men who are at the receiving end of the deadly Section 498 (A) of the Indian Penal Code (IPC) since 2005.
However, Gupta’s merriment disappears when he explains, why he gave up his booming consultancy practice and took up studying law.
“My only son was, and continues to be a victim of the extortionist element ingrained in Section 498 (A),” he says. “His wife left him after just three months of marriage, then demanded monthly maintenance from him. We paid her for 15 months till my son finished his studies then he filed for divorce. When she realised that he would not meet any more demands, she alleged harassment,” he added. The Section 498 (A) deals with ‘husband or relative of husband of a woman subjecting her to cruelty’. The case is still on at Mulund court, and Gupta vows that once his studies are over, he will fight his son’s case and put the woman behind bars.
“There are scores of men out there, all like my son, who have horrific tales to tell. When I heard their stories, I decided to fight such cases free of cost once I became a lawyer,” he says. The SIFF members in Mumbai are also part of the Protect Indian Family Foundation (PIFF), which operates three helplines in Mumbai.
There are over 5,000 active SIFF members in the country today, with over 175 in Mumbai.
“We are handling 100 new calls per month and will start more helplines to serve every needy person,” says Gupta.
Apart from PIFF taking a rally to Bandra Family court in June, the movement is set to hit TV screens as well. “We are registered with Indian Motion Pictures Association (IMPA) and are working on a tele-serial dealing with husbands’ harassment by misusing the laws,” Gupta says.
Gupta can be contacted on 09869323538 and another SIFF member, P R Gokul, on 09821414336. Nationwide helpline numbers are available on www.saveindianfamily.org.
EMAIL
bureaus@sakaaltimes.com
URL
http://www.saveindianfamily.org
Mumbai:
While other men of his age eagerly anticipate the retirement years or enjoy the company of their families, Mohanlal Gupta (56) pores over piles of heavy law books. The former IITian is not studying to add to his skills, but out of a humane necessity to save men and families troubled by scheming wives.
“I am the oldest student in the Siddharth Law College, even older than the principal by 15 days,” laughs Gupta, who spearheads the Mumbai chapter of the Save Indian Family Foundation (SIFF), which has been helping men who are at the receiving end of the deadly Section 498 (A) of the Indian Penal Code (IPC) since 2005.
However, Gupta’s merriment disappears when he explains, why he gave up his booming consultancy practice and took up studying law.
“My only son was, and continues to be a victim of the extortionist element ingrained in Section 498 (A),” he says. “His wife left him after just three months of marriage, then demanded monthly maintenance from him. We paid her for 15 months till my son finished his studies then he filed for divorce. When she realised that he would not meet any more demands, she alleged harassment,” he added. The Section 498 (A) deals with ‘husband or relative of husband of a woman subjecting her to cruelty’. The case is still on at Mulund court, and Gupta vows that once his studies are over, he will fight his son’s case and put the woman behind bars.
“There are scores of men out there, all like my son, who have horrific tales to tell. When I heard their stories, I decided to fight such cases free of cost once I became a lawyer,” he says. The SIFF members in Mumbai are also part of the Protect Indian Family Foundation (PIFF), which operates three helplines in Mumbai.
There are over 5,000 active SIFF members in the country today, with over 175 in Mumbai.
“We are handling 100 new calls per month and will start more helplines to serve every needy person,” says Gupta.
Apart from PIFF taking a rally to Bandra Family court in June, the movement is set to hit TV screens as well. “We are registered with Indian Motion Pictures Association (IMPA) and are working on a tele-serial dealing with husbands’ harassment by misusing the laws,” Gupta says.
Gupta can be contacted on 09869323538 and another SIFF member, P R Gokul, on 09821414336. Nationwide helpline numbers are available on www.saveindianfamily.org.
bureaus@sakaaltimes.com
URL
http://www.saveindianfamily.org
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Report in Indian Express- "In a legal Mess"
In a legal mess
Saturday May 10 2008 20:03 IST
CHENNAI
Prime Minister Manmohan Singh’s call for the setting up of family courts in every district of the country has evoked mixed reactions in Tamil Nadu with some housewives urging the government to focus on the more important issues such as the steep hike in prices, on the one hand, and lawyers, on the other, terming the call timely and welcome.
“You allow more TASMAC shops, which are the root cause of marital discord and then you suggest more family courts be set up,” says Lakshmi, a middle-aged mother of two from Mylapore who faces torment at the hands of her husband, a regular drinker.
“Improve the functioning of the existing courts,” urges Gomathi of Royapuram, who visits the court in the city to get the maintenance her divorced husband is to give her.
There are six family courts in Tamil Nadu — three in Chennai, and one each in Madurai, Coimbatore and Salem. The government has agreed to establish more such courts in the state. The three courts in Chennai have the necessary infrastructure. There are separate rooms for counselling estranged couples. Two psychiatrics regularly visit the courts. There is also a children’s centre to look after the little ones while parents are in court.
Advocate Arul Mozhi says that the subordinate courts in the districts are already over-burdened with criminal and civil cases and the judges don’t have the time, temperament, patience, or expertise to deal with matrimonial cases.
“There is a feeling that family courts are set up to separate couples. It is not so. On the contrary, the courts will strive to unite them. Divorce is decreed in only exceptional cases, that too after exhausting all procedures such as counselling, mediation and psychological assistance. In cases of alcoholism, the person is referred to a de-addiction centre,” says Geetha Ramseshan, another advocate who deals with matrimonial cases.
“There are so many problems within a family and among spouses. The younger generation nowadays is quite different. The problems being faced by the IT professionals are unique. Therefore, each town needs a family court,” says Ramseshan.
T S Sekaran
CUTTACK
Sarojini Das has been making the rounds of the sub-divisional judicial magistrate’s court in Ganjam for the last three years. The 28-year-old has filed a suit seeking maintenance from her husband, who deserted her after five years of marriage. Date after date, the hapless woman who has a meagre source of livelihood and hopes for an order ensuring the payment of a monthly maintenance to her, goes to court but returns disappointed as the case is not heard or is posted for another date. The reason: a huge cause-list or non-appearance of her spouse.
Das is not the only one. Thousands of women, particularly from the lower class and the backward sections of our society are going through similar ordeals across courts in Orissa, because of the paucity of designated courts for adjudicating family cases. The number of these cases is only spiralling because of modernity-spurred marital discords coupled with rising levels of awareness on rights of relief.
Orissa, which has a population of more than four crore, has only two family courts, one in Cuttack and the other in Rourkela. The people in the other 25 districts have to bank on the courts of the sub-divisional judicial magistrate and judicial magistrate first class for maintenance cases and the civil judges for divorce and separation cases. As such, though all disputes relating to family matters are to be settled within one year, only a handful of cases have been decided within the constitutionally stipulated timeframe.
“The delay is inevitable. The trial courts have a back-bending backlog of cases. Thus, family cases, especially those relating to separation and maintenance, are pushed to the backburner,” explains a judicial officer. The non-appearance of the spouses on summons, as well as the inaction of police in executing warrants issued against them has also been a bane, the officer added.
At present, more than three lakh cases are pending in the lower judiciary with matrimonial cases accounting for at least 40,000 of them. The situation in the family courts in Cuttack and Rourkela is not much better. Several cases are pending in these courts, which are plagued by infrastructure deficiencies and shortage of staff.
The Cuttack court alone has a backlog of around 5,000 cases with an average of 1,800 cases being filed every. The court premises comprises one hall, half of which is used for court purposes and the other as office and chamber. Counselling, which forms the core of settling family matters, through mediation and reconciliation, is worst hit as there is no space nor atmosphere for vital personal interactions. The two counselors have to sit in non-conducive zones with litigants, who would not open up in public. Thus, reconciliation overtures are grossly affected and this leads to cases dragging on. Besides, around 325 warrants in maintenance cases have been issued between 2001 and 2008, but these have not been executed by the police.
Chief Minister Naveen Patnaik has been quick to announce the setting up family courts in seven districts within this year. If things move in the right direction, it would provide the much needed succour to suffering people.
(Names have been changed to honour the privacy of the litigants)
Bikram Nayak and SN Agragami
KARNATAKA
The need for external mechanisms to resolve family disputes is as much a reality in Karnataka as anywhere else. Unfortunately, there are only 15 family courts in the state and none in north Karnataka. This has forced people to head to the mediation centres , which have been set up as an alternate forum for dispute resolution.
Of the 5,834 cases filed in the family courts in the state since January 2007, 4,356 were referred to the mediation centres, which have a 70 per cent success rate for divorces and custody disputes, and an overall success rate of 53 per cent. In contrast, in family courts, people are forced to wait an entire day, not knowing when they would have to appear before an adjudicator — most of the time for an adjournment. This also translates into more money for lawyers.
The director of the mediation center, K N Keshavanarayana, points to the positive nature of intervention at the centres. Besides, disputes referred to mediation centers have to be resolved in 60 days. Buoyed by the success of these centres, 10 more have been planned in the districts, where the picture is dismal with some not having any family court.
Several disputes await resolution in Belgaum but there is only one family court. The backlog is inevitable — about 1,500 cases are pending and 100-120 are scheduled per day.
In Shimoga, the number of cases is steadily on the rise but are being dealt with the at the civil courts and the delays have caused disappointment. Till 2006-07 about 2,000 matrimonial cases, including 938 maintenance cases, were to be resolved. One example is that of Santosh and his wife, who have been waiting for two-and-a-half years to divorce. “If there was a family court, our case would have been concluded much earlier,” says Santhosh. A family court has finally been sanctioned in Shimoga district and is expected to start functioning after the vacations.
Even Mangalore does not have a family court. This results in a lot of frustration for the litigants one of whom points out that the chief judicial magistrate’s court first hears motor vehicle cases and then takes up those pertaining to conjugal rights and maintenance issues, as petty criminals, police personnel and sneering lawyers look on.
“Lawyers do not believe in protecting the institution of marriage and always skip conciliatory steps to directly file for divorce,” asserts the journalist. This eagerness to file cases, compounded by the dearth of family courts, only adds to the backlog.
(Nandini Chandrashekar in Bangalore, Harsha in Mangalore, Tushar A Manjukar in Belgaum and Ancy Johnson in Shimoga)
ANDHRA PRADESH
The record has been dismal. More than two decades after a central legislation was enacted for the creation of family courts, Andhra Pradesh has just four — one each in Hyderabad, Secunderabad, Visakhapatnam and Khammam. Between 2006 and now, orders were issued for the setting up of 18 more courts, but these are yet to come into being for a variety of reasons, including lack of infrastructure.
As a result, cases are still heard by regular courts in most cases and thus drag on for five or more years. Even in the family courts, cases drag on for more than two years as the presiding officers are overburdened — in Hyderabad, more than 1,000 cases are filed every year. Unable to handle the pressure, presiding officers have been outsourcing the cross-examination by appointing advocate commissioners, so that the judges themselves can devote time to reconciliation, which constitutes the core activity of a family court. To save time, arguments are also permitted only in writing.
The government order of March 28, 2006, sanctioned nine family courts — one each in Guntur, Karimnagar, Visakhapatnam, Eluru (West Godavari district), Anantapur, Rangareddy, Khammam, Kadapa and Vizianagaram. On January 17, 2008, it ordered the creation of courts in Hyderabad, Nellore, Prakasam, Adilabad, Srikakulam, Mahboobnagar, Nalgonda, Sangareddy (Medak district) and Rajahmundry (East Godavari district).
A senior official of the Andhra Pradesh High Court admits that the delay in setting up these courts has been causing inconvenience to litigants, but says, “The process is almost over and judges would be posted in all family courts by end of this month.”
Says advocate Vasudha Nagaraj, who was part of a team led by senior matrimonial lawyer Flavia Agnes that studied the functioning of family courts across the country in 2004, “It is true that a case is taking nearly two to three years to get disposed of, but regular courts take twice as much time. There are also some other good features about these courts — adjournments are not given easily, there is no court fee and the parties are made to appear regularly.”
The panel submitted its recommendations to all family court judges and district legal services authority.
For Andhra Pradesh, these include a separate room for access to children as orders are passed for the non-custodial parent to meet the child within the court premises, cells to provide basic information regarding court procedures, dates and status of the case; pre-litigation counselling centres so that a dispute can be amicably resolved, and appointment of lawyers only as amicus curiae and not in a commercial mode.
V L Srinivasan
KERALA
The very concept of marital law in India changed with the enactment of the Family Courts Act in 1984. Conciliation and peaceful settlement of family disputes became the key words. The family courts were also seen as a way of doing away with the protracted procedures of the civil courts and thus reduce the suffering of the litigants.
However, these institutions have not been totally successful. Kerala has 16 family courts — two each in the districts of Thiruvananthapuram and Kollam and one each in the other 12 — but these have been unable to cope with the load. There were as many as 30,741 cases pending in these courts, many more than three years old.
One reason for this is the tremendous social change that has taken place in the state. The change in lifestyle caused by the inflow of NRI funds, the education and employment of women and their consequent economic independence, gender sensitization, the surge in nuclear families, consumerism, and increasing criminality have all affected the family set-up and led to a rise in the number of broken homes and divorce cases.
Some other issues also need to be addressed. The provisions of the civil or criminal procedure codes do not bar family courts from laying down their own procedures for the settlement of matrimonial disputes. The Act, with the aim of achieving reconciliation, also envisages the association of people engaged in social welfare in the resolution of disputes. However, family courts are often not conducive to reconciliation and “act as extensions of civil courts”, says advocate Lekha Suresh, who has been very active in the social sector.
The Act also provides for appointment of counsellors to assist family courts dispose of disputes. However, the number of cases is so large that it becomes difficult for counsellors to discharge their duties properly and they, thus, act mechanically.
A family court can also take the help of a medical expert or a person professionally engaged in promoting the welfare of the family. The state is supposed to pay the expert but more often than not the parties are forced to fork out the money. “How many people can afford this?” asks Lekha. The aim of setting up family courts is “to treat the root cause instead of treating the symptoms”, as a division bench of the Kerala High Court pointed out. However, even now the symptoms, and not the root causes, are being treated.
Scaria Meledam
Saturday May 10 2008 20:03 IST
CHENNAI
Prime Minister Manmohan Singh’s call for the setting up of family courts in every district of the country has evoked mixed reactions in Tamil Nadu with some housewives urging the government to focus on the more important issues such as the steep hike in prices, on the one hand, and lawyers, on the other, terming the call timely and welcome.
“You allow more TASMAC shops, which are the root cause of marital discord and then you suggest more family courts be set up,” says Lakshmi, a middle-aged mother of two from Mylapore who faces torment at the hands of her husband, a regular drinker.
“Improve the functioning of the existing courts,” urges Gomathi of Royapuram, who visits the court in the city to get the maintenance her divorced husband is to give her.
There are six family courts in Tamil Nadu — three in Chennai, and one each in Madurai, Coimbatore and Salem. The government has agreed to establish more such courts in the state. The three courts in Chennai have the necessary infrastructure. There are separate rooms for counselling estranged couples. Two psychiatrics regularly visit the courts. There is also a children’s centre to look after the little ones while parents are in court.
Advocate Arul Mozhi says that the subordinate courts in the districts are already over-burdened with criminal and civil cases and the judges don’t have the time, temperament, patience, or expertise to deal with matrimonial cases.
“There is a feeling that family courts are set up to separate couples. It is not so. On the contrary, the courts will strive to unite them. Divorce is decreed in only exceptional cases, that too after exhausting all procedures such as counselling, mediation and psychological assistance. In cases of alcoholism, the person is referred to a de-addiction centre,” says Geetha Ramseshan, another advocate who deals with matrimonial cases.
“There are so many problems within a family and among spouses. The younger generation nowadays is quite different. The problems being faced by the IT professionals are unique. Therefore, each town needs a family court,” says Ramseshan.
T S Sekaran
CUTTACK
Sarojini Das has been making the rounds of the sub-divisional judicial magistrate’s court in Ganjam for the last three years. The 28-year-old has filed a suit seeking maintenance from her husband, who deserted her after five years of marriage. Date after date, the hapless woman who has a meagre source of livelihood and hopes for an order ensuring the payment of a monthly maintenance to her, goes to court but returns disappointed as the case is not heard or is posted for another date. The reason: a huge cause-list or non-appearance of her spouse.
Das is not the only one. Thousands of women, particularly from the lower class and the backward sections of our society are going through similar ordeals across courts in Orissa, because of the paucity of designated courts for adjudicating family cases. The number of these cases is only spiralling because of modernity-spurred marital discords coupled with rising levels of awareness on rights of relief.
Orissa, which has a population of more than four crore, has only two family courts, one in Cuttack and the other in Rourkela. The people in the other 25 districts have to bank on the courts of the sub-divisional judicial magistrate and judicial magistrate first class for maintenance cases and the civil judges for divorce and separation cases. As such, though all disputes relating to family matters are to be settled within one year, only a handful of cases have been decided within the constitutionally stipulated timeframe.
“The delay is inevitable. The trial courts have a back-bending backlog of cases. Thus, family cases, especially those relating to separation and maintenance, are pushed to the backburner,” explains a judicial officer. The non-appearance of the spouses on summons, as well as the inaction of police in executing warrants issued against them has also been a bane, the officer added.
At present, more than three lakh cases are pending in the lower judiciary with matrimonial cases accounting for at least 40,000 of them. The situation in the family courts in Cuttack and Rourkela is not much better. Several cases are pending in these courts, which are plagued by infrastructure deficiencies and shortage of staff.
The Cuttack court alone has a backlog of around 5,000 cases with an average of 1,800 cases being filed every. The court premises comprises one hall, half of which is used for court purposes and the other as office and chamber. Counselling, which forms the core of settling family matters, through mediation and reconciliation, is worst hit as there is no space nor atmosphere for vital personal interactions. The two counselors have to sit in non-conducive zones with litigants, who would not open up in public. Thus, reconciliation overtures are grossly affected and this leads to cases dragging on. Besides, around 325 warrants in maintenance cases have been issued between 2001 and 2008, but these have not been executed by the police.
Chief Minister Naveen Patnaik has been quick to announce the setting up family courts in seven districts within this year. If things move in the right direction, it would provide the much needed succour to suffering people.
(Names have been changed to honour the privacy of the litigants)
Bikram Nayak and SN Agragami
KARNATAKA
The need for external mechanisms to resolve family disputes is as much a reality in Karnataka as anywhere else. Unfortunately, there are only 15 family courts in the state and none in north Karnataka. This has forced people to head to the mediation centres , which have been set up as an alternate forum for dispute resolution.
Of the 5,834 cases filed in the family courts in the state since January 2007, 4,356 were referred to the mediation centres, which have a 70 per cent success rate for divorces and custody disputes, and an overall success rate of 53 per cent. In contrast, in family courts, people are forced to wait an entire day, not knowing when they would have to appear before an adjudicator — most of the time for an adjournment. This also translates into more money for lawyers.
The director of the mediation center, K N Keshavanarayana, points to the positive nature of intervention at the centres. Besides, disputes referred to mediation centers have to be resolved in 60 days. Buoyed by the success of these centres, 10 more have been planned in the districts, where the picture is dismal with some not having any family court.
Several disputes await resolution in Belgaum but there is only one family court. The backlog is inevitable — about 1,500 cases are pending and 100-120 are scheduled per day.
In Shimoga, the number of cases is steadily on the rise but are being dealt with the at the civil courts and the delays have caused disappointment. Till 2006-07 about 2,000 matrimonial cases, including 938 maintenance cases, were to be resolved. One example is that of Santosh and his wife, who have been waiting for two-and-a-half years to divorce. “If there was a family court, our case would have been concluded much earlier,” says Santhosh. A family court has finally been sanctioned in Shimoga district and is expected to start functioning after the vacations.
Even Mangalore does not have a family court. This results in a lot of frustration for the litigants one of whom points out that the chief judicial magistrate’s court first hears motor vehicle cases and then takes up those pertaining to conjugal rights and maintenance issues, as petty criminals, police personnel and sneering lawyers look on.
“Lawyers do not believe in protecting the institution of marriage and always skip conciliatory steps to directly file for divorce,” asserts the journalist. This eagerness to file cases, compounded by the dearth of family courts, only adds to the backlog.
(Nandini Chandrashekar in Bangalore, Harsha in Mangalore, Tushar A Manjukar in Belgaum and Ancy Johnson in Shimoga)
ANDHRA PRADESH
The record has been dismal. More than two decades after a central legislation was enacted for the creation of family courts, Andhra Pradesh has just four — one each in Hyderabad, Secunderabad, Visakhapatnam and Khammam. Between 2006 and now, orders were issued for the setting up of 18 more courts, but these are yet to come into being for a variety of reasons, including lack of infrastructure.
As a result, cases are still heard by regular courts in most cases and thus drag on for five or more years. Even in the family courts, cases drag on for more than two years as the presiding officers are overburdened — in Hyderabad, more than 1,000 cases are filed every year. Unable to handle the pressure, presiding officers have been outsourcing the cross-examination by appointing advocate commissioners, so that the judges themselves can devote time to reconciliation, which constitutes the core activity of a family court. To save time, arguments are also permitted only in writing.
The government order of March 28, 2006, sanctioned nine family courts — one each in Guntur, Karimnagar, Visakhapatnam, Eluru (West Godavari district), Anantapur, Rangareddy, Khammam, Kadapa and Vizianagaram. On January 17, 2008, it ordered the creation of courts in Hyderabad, Nellore, Prakasam, Adilabad, Srikakulam, Mahboobnagar, Nalgonda, Sangareddy (Medak district) and Rajahmundry (East Godavari district).
A senior official of the Andhra Pradesh High Court admits that the delay in setting up these courts has been causing inconvenience to litigants, but says, “The process is almost over and judges would be posted in all family courts by end of this month.”
Says advocate Vasudha Nagaraj, who was part of a team led by senior matrimonial lawyer Flavia Agnes that studied the functioning of family courts across the country in 2004, “It is true that a case is taking nearly two to three years to get disposed of, but regular courts take twice as much time. There are also some other good features about these courts — adjournments are not given easily, there is no court fee and the parties are made to appear regularly.”
The panel submitted its recommendations to all family court judges and district legal services authority.
For Andhra Pradesh, these include a separate room for access to children as orders are passed for the non-custodial parent to meet the child within the court premises, cells to provide basic information regarding court procedures, dates and status of the case; pre-litigation counselling centres so that a dispute can be amicably resolved, and appointment of lawyers only as amicus curiae and not in a commercial mode.
V L Srinivasan
KERALA
The very concept of marital law in India changed with the enactment of the Family Courts Act in 1984. Conciliation and peaceful settlement of family disputes became the key words. The family courts were also seen as a way of doing away with the protracted procedures of the civil courts and thus reduce the suffering of the litigants.
However, these institutions have not been totally successful. Kerala has 16 family courts — two each in the districts of Thiruvananthapuram and Kollam and one each in the other 12 — but these have been unable to cope with the load. There were as many as 30,741 cases pending in these courts, many more than three years old.
One reason for this is the tremendous social change that has taken place in the state. The change in lifestyle caused by the inflow of NRI funds, the education and employment of women and their consequent economic independence, gender sensitization, the surge in nuclear families, consumerism, and increasing criminality have all affected the family set-up and led to a rise in the number of broken homes and divorce cases.
Some other issues also need to be addressed. The provisions of the civil or criminal procedure codes do not bar family courts from laying down their own procedures for the settlement of matrimonial disputes. The Act, with the aim of achieving reconciliation, also envisages the association of people engaged in social welfare in the resolution of disputes. However, family courts are often not conducive to reconciliation and “act as extensions of civil courts”, says advocate Lekha Suresh, who has been very active in the social sector.
The Act also provides for appointment of counsellors to assist family courts dispose of disputes. However, the number of cases is so large that it becomes difficult for counsellors to discharge their duties properly and they, thus, act mechanically.
A family court can also take the help of a medical expert or a person professionally engaged in promoting the welfare of the family. The state is supposed to pay the expert but more often than not the parties are forced to fork out the money. “How many people can afford this?” asks Lekha. The aim of setting up family courts is “to treat the root cause instead of treating the symptoms”, as a division bench of the Kerala High Court pointed out. However, even now the symptoms, and not the root causes, are being treated.
Scaria Meledam
Thursday, May 08, 2008
Nymphotropism a boon or a bane?
Protect women, as they are the propagators of the clan, the age old line of thought reflects itself in the design of the oldest and hitherto most sacrosanct social institution called MARRIAGE which forms the basis of blissful life and the foundation of societal structures. And that is fairly acceptable too, if we delve deep into the factual synopsis leading to the concept of marriages. The institution of marriage was in actuality designed to provide protection to the female members of the social clan. Biologically females have reproductive power and this makes it important to the society to take care of the females by protecting them, even if they are criminals. Genetically males are designed to feel heroic saving a woman, and want to go out of the board in their bid to protect a female from another male. Welcome to the euphoria of Nymphotropism which has so far been very influential in the major events worldwide.
Nymphotropism, as we take its view as the conjugate equivalent of chauvinism, is quite a controversial phenomenon universally for expressiveness and emotional outcry being the formidable most and distinctive features of the female gender, cannot be merely ruled away as a manipulative tool nor be taken for granted at all instances to be genuine and true, though it enjoys a ubiquitous benefit of doubt ab initio. A woman’s tear does rattle the audiences’ heart for once and wicked women take advantage of this to fool a man into believing her alleged and described ordeals to be true. Well this may be disastrous as she could be conspiring against a man to settle her personal vendetta, by making two men fight over her. Her victim could be innocent as well who would be vandalized as the woman’s tears were believed to be true, courtesy, Nymphotropism. As we started with the thought of protecting women for they are the propagators of the clan, but then do not men need a protection and as this question certainly irks the rationale, it has a very straightforward answer as well, males being accorded the role of a Protector and the Provider in the society need to make provisions to protect themselves, for one who is not able to protect self, cannot protect others.
A man, who protects a woman, not only develops a self- feeling of greatness and overwhelming, but is also hailed by peers and superiors equally and so this adds another point to the ever spreading influence of Nymphotropism. Taking a cue from this, wicked men world over have always tried to portray their own brethren in bad light, by passing over their own misdeeds as traits of men, in general, and making the world believe that women need a lot of protection from men and this protection has to come from a man only. Sounds ironical but is unfortunately true as well. This practice mandated the formulation of laws needed to protect women. So we can see that it was Nymphotropism that led to the foundation of a societal and legal structure that accords a very fragile and victimized status to women and an oppressing view to men. While this helps wicked men and women get their way along, it’s the innocent ones (both men and women) who suffer because of this. Not only this there are many other unthought-of and non – analyzed fallouts and consequences of Nymphotropism which we shall see further.
Going by statistics we have close to 70, 000 cases of dowry harassment filed every year and about 8000 cases of Domestic Violence, 98 % of which are false and hence uncalled for in first place. And then these cases go on running for years together with little progress except for changing dates and applications and objections. Also each such matter involves close to 5-6 intertwined cases each having its own set of applications and objections. If we calculate the huge amount of paper base that is wasted for these false cases, all thanks to Nymphotropism, which facilitated the enactment of heavily lopsided laws, open to wide misuse void of any punishment for the same, the substantial contribution that goes to global warming because of this paper wastage is hard to imagine. And Nymphotropism is not an isolated phenomenon in India alone it exists world over and hence projecting the above paper wastage world over, it will be petrifying to imagine the amount of global warming that has attenuated. For paper is made from wood pulp and for that the forest cover is devoured thus leading to lesser and lesser rainfall and we have what almost every scientist on earth has been talking of, THE GLOBAL WARMING, though not solely caused as a side – effect of Nymphotropism, but has a substantial share attributed to it. And there is one more reason to this, the more such cases are filed, the more people require to travel, intra – city, inter – city, inter – country thus leading to increased fuel consumption and increased pollution and carbon emanation into the atmosphere.
Had it not been for Nymphotropism to believe everything that a woman says decorated with tears, even to the extent of ignoring and invalidating irrefutable evidence proving the alleged ordeals otherwise, we would not have had such a bad state of affairs, currently the institution of marriage and society is in. Men in the western countries have already started despising marriage and the average age of marriage has gone up drastically, men in India, have started developing distrust and a hidden fear regarding marriage. If, once for a while we assume that draconian marital laws are not misused, then also this sweet monster called Nymphotropism is disastrous to men married to wicked wives, as they will keep driving the nymphomaniac society towards these men, either for sadistic pleasure or realize their ulterior motives and objectives.
Nymphotropism breeds ignominy and distrust among males, as generally it is a man against another man due to an intervening female. And again it is due to Nymphotropism only that eunuch impressed sons get separated from parents and we are yet to hear a single instance of a son disowning his parents prior to his marriage, for otherwise, instances are galore and not far to seek.
The time has come wherein the society realizes about the perils Nymphotropism poses to the human race and comes out of the lethal euphoria before it is too late.
Nymphotropism, as we take its view as the conjugate equivalent of chauvinism, is quite a controversial phenomenon universally for expressiveness and emotional outcry being the formidable most and distinctive features of the female gender, cannot be merely ruled away as a manipulative tool nor be taken for granted at all instances to be genuine and true, though it enjoys a ubiquitous benefit of doubt ab initio. A woman’s tear does rattle the audiences’ heart for once and wicked women take advantage of this to fool a man into believing her alleged and described ordeals to be true. Well this may be disastrous as she could be conspiring against a man to settle her personal vendetta, by making two men fight over her. Her victim could be innocent as well who would be vandalized as the woman’s tears were believed to be true, courtesy, Nymphotropism. As we started with the thought of protecting women for they are the propagators of the clan, but then do not men need a protection and as this question certainly irks the rationale, it has a very straightforward answer as well, males being accorded the role of a Protector and the Provider in the society need to make provisions to protect themselves, for one who is not able to protect self, cannot protect others.
A man, who protects a woman, not only develops a self- feeling of greatness and overwhelming, but is also hailed by peers and superiors equally and so this adds another point to the ever spreading influence of Nymphotropism. Taking a cue from this, wicked men world over have always tried to portray their own brethren in bad light, by passing over their own misdeeds as traits of men, in general, and making the world believe that women need a lot of protection from men and this protection has to come from a man only. Sounds ironical but is unfortunately true as well. This practice mandated the formulation of laws needed to protect women. So we can see that it was Nymphotropism that led to the foundation of a societal and legal structure that accords a very fragile and victimized status to women and an oppressing view to men. While this helps wicked men and women get their way along, it’s the innocent ones (both men and women) who suffer because of this. Not only this there are many other unthought-of and non – analyzed fallouts and consequences of Nymphotropism which we shall see further.
Going by statistics we have close to 70, 000 cases of dowry harassment filed every year and about 8000 cases of Domestic Violence, 98 % of which are false and hence uncalled for in first place. And then these cases go on running for years together with little progress except for changing dates and applications and objections. Also each such matter involves close to 5-6 intertwined cases each having its own set of applications and objections. If we calculate the huge amount of paper base that is wasted for these false cases, all thanks to Nymphotropism, which facilitated the enactment of heavily lopsided laws, open to wide misuse void of any punishment for the same, the substantial contribution that goes to global warming because of this paper wastage is hard to imagine. And Nymphotropism is not an isolated phenomenon in India alone it exists world over and hence projecting the above paper wastage world over, it will be petrifying to imagine the amount of global warming that has attenuated. For paper is made from wood pulp and for that the forest cover is devoured thus leading to lesser and lesser rainfall and we have what almost every scientist on earth has been talking of, THE GLOBAL WARMING, though not solely caused as a side – effect of Nymphotropism, but has a substantial share attributed to it. And there is one more reason to this, the more such cases are filed, the more people require to travel, intra – city, inter – city, inter – country thus leading to increased fuel consumption and increased pollution and carbon emanation into the atmosphere.
Had it not been for Nymphotropism to believe everything that a woman says decorated with tears, even to the extent of ignoring and invalidating irrefutable evidence proving the alleged ordeals otherwise, we would not have had such a bad state of affairs, currently the institution of marriage and society is in. Men in the western countries have already started despising marriage and the average age of marriage has gone up drastically, men in India, have started developing distrust and a hidden fear regarding marriage. If, once for a while we assume that draconian marital laws are not misused, then also this sweet monster called Nymphotropism is disastrous to men married to wicked wives, as they will keep driving the nymphomaniac society towards these men, either for sadistic pleasure or realize their ulterior motives and objectives.
Nymphotropism breeds ignominy and distrust among males, as generally it is a man against another man due to an intervening female. And again it is due to Nymphotropism only that eunuch impressed sons get separated from parents and we are yet to hear a single instance of a son disowning his parents prior to his marriage, for otherwise, instances are galore and not far to seek.
The time has come wherein the society realizes about the perils Nymphotropism poses to the human race and comes out of the lethal euphoria before it is too late.
Thursday, May 01, 2008
Two newspaper reports on Bigamy-Adultery legal position:Actor Pavan Kalyan Case
I have not married Pavan Kalyan: Counters Renu Desai (Courtsey The New Indian Express)
Wednesday July 4 2007 12:42 IST
VISAKHAPATNAM: In a curious twist to the tale, Renu Desai, who reportedly married actor Pavan Kalyan without the latter giving divorce to Nandini, stated in a reply to legal notices that she did not marry Pavan Kalyan at all.
Renu Desai’s reply came to light in the course of investigation on Tuesday and petitioner Nandini’s legal counsel is learnt to be exploring various options to make the actor depose before the judge.“It is a fact that the actress had responded to notices received by her on May 5, and has said in the counter that she did not marry Pavan Kalyan and she was implicated in the case without any involvement in the case,” Nandini’s advocate B Satyanarayana told this website’s newspaper.
Satyanarayana said Renu Desai had sent the reply on May 18 through her advocate in Hyderabad and it contained an address in Pune, suggesting that she was not with Pavan Kalyan.Much before the filing of a bigamy case by Nandini before the First Additional Chief Metropolitan Magistrate recently, several notices were sent to Pavan Kalyan and Renu Desai to undo the injustice done to Nandini.It was after the defendants gave unsatisfactory replies that the bigamy case was filed before the metropolitan magistrate.
A dowry harassment case under Sec. 498(A) was filed subsequently against the entire family of Pavan Kalyan, including his actor brother Chiranjeevi.Claiming to be the wife of Pavan Kalyan, Nandini contended that he married Renu Desai without divorcing her and sought a monthly alimony of Rs 5 lakh.
2nd Report
Pavan Kalyan wants divorce (Courtsey Times of India)
8 Mar 2008, 0324 hrs IST,TNN
VISAKHAPATNAM: With Nandini refusing the divorce plea of actor Pavan Kalyan on Friday, the case took a curious turn with the family court postponing the matter to March 28 for further hearing.
When the magistrate tried to counsel the warring couple, the actor reportedly stuck to his ground that there was no question of reconciliation with his estranged wife and he had no plans to live with her. He further argued that he had moved ahead with his life and he could not share or start a new life with Nandini and demanded a divorce from her.
Nandini's lawyer tried to reason out with the judge that his client was willing to go back and stay with the actor in Hyderabad. However, Pavan ruled out any rapprochement in this regard. At this point, Nandini made it clear that she was averse to divorce. When the judge sought to know whether she wanted a reconciliation, she replied 'yes', while Pavan Kalyan said 'no'. With the efforts to bring them together having failed, the judge postponed the case to March 28.
Meanwhile, Nandini pleaded with the magistrate to grant her Rs 1.6 crore along with a monthly alimony of Rs 5 lakh in the bigamy case she filed against the Telugu film actor. The bigamy case was dismissed by the Visakhapatnam metropolitan magistrate court last month. After taking versions of Pavan and Nandini in the alimony case, the judge postponed the case to March 28 for further hearing.
Wednesday July 4 2007 12:42 IST
VISAKHAPATNAM: In a curious twist to the tale, Renu Desai, who reportedly married actor Pavan Kalyan without the latter giving divorce to Nandini, stated in a reply to legal notices that she did not marry Pavan Kalyan at all.
Renu Desai’s reply came to light in the course of investigation on Tuesday and petitioner Nandini’s legal counsel is learnt to be exploring various options to make the actor depose before the judge.“It is a fact that the actress had responded to notices received by her on May 5, and has said in the counter that she did not marry Pavan Kalyan and she was implicated in the case without any involvement in the case,” Nandini’s advocate B Satyanarayana told this website’s newspaper.
Satyanarayana said Renu Desai had sent the reply on May 18 through her advocate in Hyderabad and it contained an address in Pune, suggesting that she was not with Pavan Kalyan.Much before the filing of a bigamy case by Nandini before the First Additional Chief Metropolitan Magistrate recently, several notices were sent to Pavan Kalyan and Renu Desai to undo the injustice done to Nandini.It was after the defendants gave unsatisfactory replies that the bigamy case was filed before the metropolitan magistrate.
A dowry harassment case under Sec. 498(A) was filed subsequently against the entire family of Pavan Kalyan, including his actor brother Chiranjeevi.Claiming to be the wife of Pavan Kalyan, Nandini contended that he married Renu Desai without divorcing her and sought a monthly alimony of Rs 5 lakh.
2nd Report
Pavan Kalyan wants divorce (Courtsey Times of India)
8 Mar 2008, 0324 hrs IST,TNN
VISAKHAPATNAM: With Nandini refusing the divorce plea of actor Pavan Kalyan on Friday, the case took a curious turn with the family court postponing the matter to March 28 for further hearing.
When the magistrate tried to counsel the warring couple, the actor reportedly stuck to his ground that there was no question of reconciliation with his estranged wife and he had no plans to live with her. He further argued that he had moved ahead with his life and he could not share or start a new life with Nandini and demanded a divorce from her.
Nandini's lawyer tried to reason out with the judge that his client was willing to go back and stay with the actor in Hyderabad. However, Pavan ruled out any rapprochement in this regard. At this point, Nandini made it clear that she was averse to divorce. When the judge sought to know whether she wanted a reconciliation, she replied 'yes', while Pavan Kalyan said 'no'. With the efforts to bring them together having failed, the judge postponed the case to March 28.
Meanwhile, Nandini pleaded with the magistrate to grant her Rs 1.6 crore along with a monthly alimony of Rs 5 lakh in the bigamy case she filed against the Telugu film actor. The bigamy case was dismissed by the Visakhapatnam metropolitan magistrate court last month. After taking versions of Pavan and Nandini in the alimony case, the judge postponed the case to March 28 for further hearing.
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
‘Provision of Domestic Violence Act not against men’Man gets life imprisonment
Marriage is a folly: Kamal Haasan
Man gets life imprisonment
Molestation case: Cross-complaint lodged
Child survives mother's suicide bid
Haryana girls hone oratory skills
330 rape, molestation cases in Delhi in 2008
Priyanka Todi, father visit Tarapith
Wife kills husband's mistress in UP
House-help arrested for molesting actor
You may now kick the bride
Girls boycott classes
2 killed as drunken baraatis open fire
DNA confirms man fathered daughter's kids
Sunday, April 27, 2008
april 27
Woman held for killing husband
Dowry case: Ex naib tehsildar booked
Rape: Time for stricter laws, more convictions
Oriya minors rescued from flesh trade
Man murders lover over money quarrel
Rape accused out on bail
Sodomy in jail leads to fisticuffs
RTI Act stronger than our law: US expert
Depressed, girl kills self in S Delhi
Dowry case: Ex naib tehsildar booked
Rape: Time for stricter laws, more convictions
Oriya minors rescued from flesh trade
Man murders lover over money quarrel
Rape accused out on bail
Sodomy in jail leads to fisticuffs
RTI Act stronger than our law: US expert
Depressed, girl kills self in S Delhi
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